Ireland feels strangely like home (a book)

Late last year, I went to Ireland for the first time. I was lucky enough to spend eight days there, touring a handful of counties with family. (My sister and I are married to brothers -- long story -- so it was me and my sister, and our husbands, who are also brothers.) Starting in Dublin for a couple days, we took a driving tour and spent a couple days in counties Roscommon, Galway and Kerry (Killarney) before heading back to Dublin to fly home.

Dublin

Our first night in Dublin we took a really early morning walkabout,
suffering from jet lag as we were. We passed by this creepy old church
on our way up the hill to Killiney Hill Park, which boasted of
the best sunrise views.

Killiney Hill Park did not disappoint, with beautiful views
overlooking parts of Dublin

On the other side of the jut were some seriously moody clouds

Then, we hopped in the car and took off for Roscommon County,
and I saw surprisingly little of the countryside...
Ireland really likes to wall off its highways and roads, as shown here,
presumably so the citizens don't have to see ugly cars
tearing through their beautiful pastoral views. :) 

 Roscommon 

We arrived at the Kilronan Castle.
I'll admit it, I totally geeked out and took all the touristy-type
pictures. I even realized I'm a tiny bit of a foodie underneath
it all. I just had to have access to afternoon tea every day.

Please?

Here's a few photos taken during a walk around the grounds
of Kilronan Castle, when I wasn't inside ordering
afternoon tea and chortling over it like a
crazy person.

This was an old entrance into the castle from
the Ha Ha (there are what looked like
horse stalls to the right). I assume this is where
the carriages pulled up and dropped off guests.

Secret passageway?!

Everywhere in Ireland you find roads and walkways
bordered by these walls. Most are extremely old, as
illustrated by this tree's roots burrowing into it.

Afternoon tea at Kilronan Castle.

While the scones were always my favorite part
of afternoon tea, the artistry of all the different
components always induced me to eat.way.too.much.
Every time.

Downstairs bar in Kilronan Castle (a few others
trickled in over the night, but we mostly had it
to ourselves)

This was my first chance to visit Ireland, though my sister and I grew up on stories of our mixed Ireland and Scotland ancestry. Nonetheless, my sister and I were both really taken aback at how comfortable we felt in Ireland, how much we felt like we "fit right in". Of course, the Irish are very welcoming and friendly, without a doubt, so even my mixed husband felt comfortable (which is often not the case in America, from which we hail). But mannerisms, vocal tones and volumes, driving style... such things I wouldn't have expected to be passed along through DNA, half a world away. According to our husbands, though, my sister and I don't fall far from the Irish tree... which was the source of a lot of teasing as we hurtled nilly-willow through the country on those narrow, walled-in roads.

Galway 

In Galway, we stayed at the comparatively modern
G hotel. The cupcakes looked a lot yummier
than they were, but that's probably what I get for
trying to eat every sugary thing I stumbled across.

It was Halloween, and the afternoon tea I ordered
at the G hotel reflected how seriously the Irish
take this important holiday. 

It broke my heart walking away from
this spooky display half-eaten, even with four people.
But doing anything else would have had
serious consequences. (Like, the plane wouldn't
have been able to take off...)

Exploring "old town" in Galway... This tiny corner
pub was my absolute favorite. I took a picture
so I would always remember.

It was a little cramped :) 

Cliffs of Moher

We spent one of our days in Galway driving over to and exploring the Cliffs of Moher. My sister and husband are not fans of heights, so it was fun to be able to turn the teasing elsewhere for one day. Below are a few photos from the trip to the Cliffs.

It was like driving in another century

According to Google, this was Dunguaire Castle that we
happened to drive past. We pulled over for a quick exploration,
but it was closed up. (Probably due to obnoxious tourists.)

When there was a hill to climb, you can expect some
seriously intense switchbacks. 

We pulled over to enjoy the view halfway up this hill, and my
husband played his new Irish whistle for the cows. 

And finally, once we were at the actual Cliffs I was too busy to take many photos...

The Cliffs were magnificent.

My husband and sister couldn't stay far enough from
the edge as we climbed up to the clifftop.
Eventually, we came across this sign and they
just couldn't contain themselves any longer.

Once the wall between us and the edge of the cliff ended and I wanted to keep going, I had a ugly rebellion on my hands. Being dragged away from "certain death", I was gifted with the chance to drive us back to Galway, like candy dangled in front of a baby to distract them. "Driving while in Ireland" should be classified in some subcategory of thrill-seeking sports. Any one of the following things could be intimidating to a driver, but throw them all together and I'm surprised I could pry my aching hands off the steering wheel when I finally pulled into the hotel parking lot that night:

Cows grazing on the narrow strips
between the switchback road heading
up the hill... Think about their cute,
bovine eyes and don't take your eyes
off that road!

1. Crazy high speed limits on a strange route
2. Driving on the wrong side of the road with road signs you don't recognize (American, remember?)
3. Narrow roads enforced by ancient walls on both sides of the road, with ancient trees growing out of them and encroaching into the road
4. Switchbacks (with cows)

It was a thrill I'll always remember. And even better, we had comprehensive insurance coverage on our rental car. Regardless, any missing paint from said encroaching tree branches are totally not my fault. Ancient trees should know better, they've seen humanity at its worst.

Kerry 

We only had one night in Kerry, but we toured the beautiful town of Killarney before we had to hop in the car for a long drive back toward Dublin.

We walked to this glade not far from our hotel (before afternoon tea)

Walking through certain parts of Killarney was a transportive experience.

And of course, even though it makes me feel
bloated, I had to have at least one delicious Guinness. 

Tipperary (unofficial stop)

On the long drive back toward Dublin, we stopped for some coffee and expected adventure at Tipperary. 

As we walked the streets of Tipperary in search
caffeine, we stumbled across Cahir Castle.

Cahir Castle has an interesting history

Maybe 15 minutes later, as we finally located our caffeine fix,
the sky abruptly clouded over

Thirty seconds later, double rainbow wow aside,
it was looking rather ominous... 

As we started walking back toward our car, the sky with the funny double rainbow suddenly opened up and began pouring down the fattest raindrops I've ever experienced. As someone who's lived in Los Angeles and Seattle, I thought I knew rain like no-ones business. Turns out Seattle rain is a joke. We were instantly drenched all the way through, freezing, so we gripped our coffees tight and ran. We drove the rest of the way to the Dublin airport steaming slightly as we slowly dried out under the care of our rental car's heating vents, on blast. Brrrrrrr!

Ireland wins. In so many ways.

dear diary

Today is the 3 week mark of Neato's brush becoming clogged with debris. Each afternoon, he wheels out of his base, revs up to take on the world of household debris, and realizes -- once again -- that his brush is stuck.

"Please free my brush of debris," he beeps politely. Again. And again, we ignore him and eventually nudge him back to his base to make sure he's charged for tomorrow's aborted attempt to rid our lives of household dust and kitty litter.

Chouji, the Roomba

I tried once to free his brush around week 1, but couldn't figure out how to open him up. Neato's predecessor, Chouji the Roomba, was so straightforward. I am bitter, but apathetically. Johnny's our household mechanic, and will probably eventually notice the problem around week 5 and fix it in a jiffy. Until then, I silently feel sorry for myself.

I've begun sweeping again, with a broom. It has a long handle and takes arm muscles to make work. The novelty of doing manual labor the old fashioned way wore off quickly. I try to talk other people into clearing brush-debris.

"I'm glad Neato's broken, his motor's too loud," grumbles my daughter, every time I complain.

"Then come use this old timey broom-thingy and do his job," says I. She laughs. Neato, 6 inches from his base and frozen there, beeps a reminder that he's ready to get back to work, just as soon as we clear his brush.

I sigh and take a swipe with the broom across the dinning room floor. Life shouldn't be this hard.

john's secret self-image

"I'm half Scandinavian and half African, but I assure you:  I'm a Jewish mother. And I will nag you for the rest of your life."

My husband John, trying to work through puberty with our almost-sixteen year old son.

D&D dungeon master to the kids and their cousins

7 year old son's resisting-reality face ;)

Son (middle) at 15 years old (sister & cousin gave
him a make-over, but dad handing him
his sword in the middle of it cracked him up)

fuglified

Definition:  "To cause to be fugly"

My new word for the day.

for making my life rich with laughter, thank you lady gaga

I realize I've posted about this Lady Gaga video before, and I'm just being mean by picking on it. I have no particular issue with Lady Gaga... this song, Alejandro, is actually annoyingly catchy and I periodically, voluntarily, listen to it. As far as Johnny and I can tell, she's just the new generation of Madonna---so what's all the hullabaloo about?

But my sister is self-professedly obsessing on this video right now, so I watched it again... and like clockwork, I'm struck utterly mindless with laughter on one particular section of this video. Check out minutes 5:45-6:35 below:



 This guy absolutely cracks me up.

 

Don't get me wrong, he seems like a great dancer. He's really got those moves down, and he's really passionate (tee-heehee) about it.  He stands out... unlike the other dancers.  I feel mean, picking on him; guy's just trying to make a living.  But the costume they've got him in just makes him look like Planet of the Apes cum Dominatrix. Rock Lee with leathers and cat ears -- only, whoops!, they ran out of cat ears and only had monkey ears left.

Look at those ears <3

 So wrong. Still wiping away the tears of laughter.

familial quirks

One of my more embarrassing stories ever goes like this:

About 6 years ago, I am coordinating my first national sales meeting. 70+ VIPs, employees and sales reps meeting in Vegas for a 2 day annual conference, of which I am In Charge.  This was my first one, so I was fairly nervous -- read:  anal and overly conscientious.  At the end of the first day, I sigh in relief as I make my way to the plush, loud lobby of our Vegas hotel with the Marketing team and a couple of the more "fun-loving" set of Reps for cocktails.

This is Vegas; the cocktails weren't joking around.  Toward the end of my second drink, which I know to be my safe limit, the head of Marketing is already climbing to his feet to grab me a third.  I know I need to wait, especially with the unfamiliar Reps scattered around the table, and my early-morning responsibilities in the morning.

"No, no!" I insist.  "I don't think that'd be a good idea. My nips are numb!"

Followed by dead silence while I stared at my drink, trying to decide whether I'd really heard that or if I had just had too much to drink and thought I heard it. The sudden, wheezing gales of laughter sealed it.  Fuck me!   I'd like to blame my flaming red face on the fact that I was laughing my ass off, but anyone who knows me knows better. ^_^;;;

"I meant my lips are numb, my lips are numb -- which is self-evident, I believe!"

I never lived that one down in that company.  In fact, knowing that marketing department and a couple other people who were there, I bet it's still laughed about every year at the Sales Conference cocktail hour. Which to be honest, I don't resent. :)

But that's not the point. The point is, everyone in my family, from my dad down, does the same kind of thing. 
Case in point:

My dad.  Ah, the genetic source material. Shy, thoughtful guy. At our recent vacation together in Long Beach, the adult group (6 of us) were talking about about movies and Netflix Instant Watch.  Defending his choice to watch The Blind Side with Sandra Bullock, he protests:

"It's not a click shits---"

I have to disagree; it is something of a chick flick.  But being the upstanding Christian that he is, this piece of unintended blasphemy ground his defense to an abrupt halt.

Poor dad. He's probably not used to being laughed at quite that hard. 

My brother. Smart guy: works as a manager in developing at the largest software developer in the nation. My story is from when he was young -- had to have been at least 10 years ago, maybe more. We were all sitting around the kitchen table, playing D&D. Roland, the Dungeon master, throws something out there to confound us, and my brother crows:

"Ah ha!  The flot pickens!"

He has never, and will never, live that down. John will see to it.

My sister.  Damn. She did it just the other week, and I drank too much to remember it. Argh!  I'll get you later, sis.

My niece.  My 21-year-old niece, Betsey, went from person to person through the entire house in order to sort us into our appropriate Harry Potter houses:  Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff or Slytherin. We're a family of gamers, so I was intrigued when she asked several people to do this "Quest".  So I asked her about it... Apparently, she kept trying to say both "quiz" and "test", and ending up with a combination: "Quest." How apropos.

My son. My 19-year-old son, Jude, just said "If someone wants to make a dig beal out of it..." (Rather than "big deal"). Christmas 2015.

My mom.  In one sense, my mom gets to sit back and laugh at us, since she doesn't have the same problem. Exactly.  However, I'm publishing an embarrassing story of her. Just to keep things even, you understand.

At Long Beach (again), the 6 of us were testing my parents against Briggs Myers' personality test.  My mother, a strong "Perceiver" on the test (vs. Judging), always has a hard time making up her mind to answer the questions, dragging it out longer and longer.  Finally, frustrated, she tried to explain:

"My P-ness is so strong that..." 

My sister, my father and I knew exactly what she was trying to say, and we just nodded sagely. John and Luna, who're genetically unlinked, just heard what she actually said and burst into laughter. Followed -- one by one -- by my family as we finally got the joke. Mom was last, but I love my family, because no one laughed harder than she did.

It's slowly gaining momentum as a legend in the family, and can be a universal excuse for back aches, trouble concentrating or simple hunger. "But my penis is so strong..."

And there it is.  Familial quirks and public humiliation.  Good times.

____
Originally published 10/2010
Edited 12/2015

safeway = base

There should be only one person who remembers this episode...

good times, good times...

But there could be two of them... or three. *cringe*

100 years of hard... (ahem)

What do Lady GaGa and Naruto have in common?









 This:

Oh, Rock Lee. Whatever did you do right in this life, to land that gig?  Must have been that 100-years of hard work.

Go, Rock!

quoting the man (mark twain)

Going through some quotes by Mark Twain here, and realizing belatedly how much I would have loved to have met the guy. I can't believe how many were so very relevant even today.  Ironically, he said it best himself:  "History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme."

"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect."  

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."  

"Classic' - a book which people praise and don't read." 

"Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."  

"Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be."

"If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed."  

"You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?" 

"God created war so that Americans would learn geography."   (Ed: still so true)

"Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime."

"A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain."  

And that's just the first page.

i think she just might....

...want to kill you.

You think? Of course, I would be looking for the nearest brassiere-pea-shooter if someone strapped me into these shoes, too. 

Found here <3

roomba: for your cat's pleasure and yours

This is the best.

i half-believe this is my brother

T -- that you? <3 We need to start Kung Fu movie night in Seattle. (Unless you've already seen them all.)

this story...

...is the funny.

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